Not Supermom

i'm not supermom.

{this is shocking, i realize, to those that now me well and step over laundry piles when you visit. :P}

i got some really nice comments and messages after my last post, 

but i realized that you may have a different view of me than i really am.

{ya know, because i only write what i want to write!  maybe i should take pictures of my dishes that are overflowing the sink or the laundry room 

that barely has some floor space right now?}

i really do love my life with little kids,

and in my heart of hearts, 

i'd have a half a dozen more,

if that's what the Lord's plan for us was.

but ya know?

the days *do* get long.

seriously.

the other night after writing this post,

I told Matt that as much as I love them and even though I *know* in ten years when they're teenagers I'll miss *these* little days,

the thought of not stepping over toys scattered everywhere and not mopping the floor for the gazillionith time that day and having kids that will for-the-love-of-pete-just-please-sleep 

sounded kinda nice.

really nice. 

 i'm so not supermom.

i get impatient and irritated and cranky.

i get tired and frustrated and think i may lose it the fighting doesn't stop right.this.second.

--

several months ago,

after my initial MRI came back indicative of MS,

i was reading Matt Chandler's blog -

a well-known pastor diagnosed with a brain tumor a few years ago.

he mentioned that during his radiation treatment for the tumor 

he had a heightened sense of reality.

that's really how I feel after being diagnosed with MS -

this heightened sense that our lives are so, so short,

and that really, the only thing that matters is how much we love God and walk in humble obedience.

--

the Great Comission tells us to go into all the world and make disciples.

for lots of us, 

we don't have to go far -

we can go right upstairs, down the hall,

into the nursery or preschooler's room.

as a stay-at-home mom, 

i have every day, all day to make disciples -

to make a fully devoted follower of Christ.

and i think i've realized that it's not in the big moments around the family devotional

or idealistic scenes at the dinner table 

that make disciples.

i show my children what it means to Love God 

when I'm patient when no one can find their shoes and we need to walk out the door right now.

i show my children what it means to Love God

when i control my own frustrations over a three-year-old not getting dressed nicely.

i show my children what it means to Love God

when i love my spouse well, when i humbly serve my neighbors,

when i speak with kind words,

even when it's the middle-of-the-night and we all need sleep.

i'm so not supermom.

i just long for all my mommy friends to realize that this day-to-day stuff?

it's bigger than we realize.

we can fulfill the Great Comission,

right in our own house.

so the day-to-day moments of frustrations?

i try to remember that though they will pass,

the way i handle them?

{my kids will remember that forever.}

 

grace abigail.